New Year Hopes

It’s hard for me to imagine that we are looking at 2021. Seems like just yesterday everyone was panicking about a new century. I remember watching some folks hoard food and supplies, thinking the world was ending at 12:00 in 2000. I guess if they had been right, the rest of us would have died or suffered immeasurable pain.

But that year started like every other, with people around the world hoping and wishing for a brighter future and a better year. This year is no different, especially after the tumultuous year we all just survived.

This year, I know many are simply hoping for an end to the outrageous political storm that we are sitting in the middle of. Many are hoping for jobs to pay enough to support their families. Many are hoping that the endless and needless lockdowns will end and families can once again gather as they want and where they want.

For me, my hopes are pretty simple too. I want to be a better person. Yes, that is vague. I have specific goals I want to reach in terms of health and career and family. I don’t like sharing my goals. I feel that puts too much pressure to achieve them. I feel like those who know my goals are judging me if I’m not at the right spot on my path. Or if I happen to take a misstep and have to regroup. Suffice it to say, I am working on self-improvement this year.

I do feel like I’ve been working that goal for six years, following the nightmare of my marriage. I was at the lowest point I could possibly have survived. It has taken me this long to believe – truly believe – that I deserve to have a good life, one that I can enjoy and feel comfortable in. For too long, I tip-toed around my life, not causing waves and just keeping the peace so everyone else could be happy. I am finally to a point that I am making my happiness central to my daily routine.

That includes choosing healthy food so that I feel good about what I’m putting into my body for energy. It includes making the choice to exercise more, especially during colder months when I’m not working outside during the day. It incudes maintaining a stricter schedule for my day and avoiding temptations that interfere with that schedule. It includes limiting tv time so that I’m more productive. And it includes making a conscious choice to be calm.

This year it also includes taking some chances on opportunities that are outside my comfort zone. I have some ideas for home businesses that I am currently pursuing, and will share web site information when they are up and running. I am also looking into self publishing some of my work. Getting anything picked up by major houses is next to impossible without an agent or some connection to those in power. After three decades of offering my work in the traditional way, I decided it’s time to try an alternative. Again I will share details when I upload.

Today, the first Monday of January, I am working on my daily schedule. I usually try to fit too much into every day and then end up frustrated at the end of those days. This year I’m trying something different, more like a jigsaw puzzle approach to scheduling what I need to get done. I am also creating dedicated work spaces for my different work. My office will remain in my bedroom. I can shut the door when I need privacy, and my laptop and table don’t take up much space.

For my other business ventures, I’m revamping the basement storage room and garage. Garris and I spent his Christmas break putting up the framework for some shelves and cutting all the parts and pieces to finish them when he’s here the next time. I am anxious to get them done and get the basement clutter gone. Once the backroom is cleaned out, I am going to put additional shelves up for my crafting and sewing projects, make myself a work table, and use that area to sew and make ornaments, etc. There is great lighting in the back room ( we just replaced the fluorescent bulbs with LED equivalents), and it is a large area that can accommodate shelving and a table.

I am excited for the opportunities that this year is affording me. I have been stuck in the same cycle of hope and despair for so long, that I was unable to look at alternatives to what I’ve always done. My hope is that I can break through the barriers this year that have frustrated me. I am looking at 2021 as the year of change. And making those changes slowly, a little bit each day.

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